One Year Later

This post will probably get a little emotional, so I'll try not to spill spaghetti everywhere. It has been just over a year since I left for Germany, which was the original purpose of this blog, hence the reason that I haven't found another clear purpose for this blog yet (goals). It wasn't until recently that I reflected on how I really felt when I returned and realized how much that impacted last semester. I don't know if depressed is the right word, but I certainly wasn't myself for some time last fall. I was confused because it was significantly more difficult to adjust back to my life in Toronto than it was to adjust to my surroundings in Germany. I reencountered the stress and overwhelming feelings that my program and university tend to inflict on its students, like any university I suppose, but I never encountered those feelings during my time abroad. It wasn't until I started my jobs in October that I began to feel better and started focusing more on using my experience to move myself forward, like I said and hoped I always would.

This semester has been a lot better - still stressful and challenging, maybe more so now than ever, but I learned how to cope with it in some new ways. Waking up early has never been much of a struggle for me, but I never considered myself a morning person until this semester. I'm surprised that I now actually prefer going to bed early to wake up early. It's my "me" time, which I had never realized how much of a difference that can make on my day. My head is much clearer in the morning and my thoughts make more sense (usually). This is nothing new, but running has always been my favorite way of de-stressing and I can't wait to be in California and be able to run outside year-round. Although this semester has been challenging and mentally exhausting at times, it's made me work harder and push myself forward by helping me regain focus and better define my goals.

One year ago, I would have never guessed that I would be moving to California to pursue my career and be with the boy I met on my second day in Germany. There are definitely some butterflies floating around in my stomach about moving across the continent but the move is necessary. This city is where I was born, lived for my first three years, and then came back for my four years of university. Toronto has been my home for some of the most vulnerable, significant years of my life and I am so grateful for everything I've learned here. But my career goals can be better achieved in San Francisco, and I can't wait to start a new chapter of my life there.

Michaela Fraser